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Why #IUsucks Let Me Count the Ways

Despite it being Thanksgiving it’s always a good day to hate your rival.

NCAA Football: Indiana at Purdue Marc Lebryk-USA TODAY Sports

Being in that it’s Thanksgiving I know a lot of us are being reflective on what the year has brought us, what we are thankful for this year, and maybe what we could do better in the coming new year. That’s all wonderful stuff. Here at Hammer and Rails though we’ve got an IU game to prepare for and so I asked the staff to send me some reasons why they hate IU/why IU sucks. Below are their responses but I want to give you mine first.

I grew up in a small town in Indiana about an hour Southeast of Indianapolis. That should tell you all you need to know about who was the favored school at my high school and really all throughout my life. Purdue fans were decidedly in the minority. When I was young I hated that, but as I’ve gotten older I’ve realized that not everything that’s good is popular and not everything that’s popular is good.

I’ve spent years interacting with IU fans. Some of my most memorable always involve older fans who seem to think it’s a good idea to yell at Purdue students. I remember one year attending the Big Ten Tournament with a group of Paint Crew members when we sat up in the rafters. In order to get up there you had to be intentional. It wasn’t a section you just stumbled upon. Regardless, a man in his late 50s or 60s came up with a piece of paper and just started waving it and yelling, you guessed it, “BANNERS!” It was one of the saddest, most pathetic things I’ve ever seen a grown man do. How sad his life must have been. Oh well. Such is their lot in life I suppose. IU Sucks, let’s keep our Bucket.


Let’s start with basketball. I went to Purdue for 5 years and not once did I see a loss to IU. 9 wins, 0 loses, 1 Archie, countless comments by ridiculous IU fans saying “banners”, 99% of which were made by people who weren’t alive when the last banner was won. This program lives in the past and relies on its name to bring in recruits, just to under-develop them. And this is supposed to be their hallmark program. Not having won a championship since the Reagan administration means you are not a blue-blood.

As for football, I only need 1 number: 703, hopefully 704 after this weekend. I guess that’s why so many fans decide to jump on the ND bandwagon (they also haven’t won a championship since the Reagan administration). At least IU is a party school so students can forget about the sports teams.


Why IU Sucks

Because reversible jackets went out in the 90’s. IU loves to live in the past, whether it’s the banners from a million years ago or a Covid football season where they believe to think they’re relevant. The notorious “champions of the offseason.” IU sucks cuz, well cuz they do.


I’ll be honest, I have a hard time hating Indiana football, and that’s why Indiana football sucks. Purdue deserves a better rival than the apathetic Hoosier fanbase. I get it, it’s hard to pull yourself away from the Notre Dame watch party at the country club, load up the B.M.W. and make it back for a Saturday game, but I would appreciate a bit more effort. Purdue seniors will end their Big10 regular season career in front of a 1/2 full (1/4 of that Purdue fans) Memorial Stadium. While other players get to play in a blood thirsty rivalry game, Purdue has to travel to the patchuli capital of the midwest, and play a team that would rather be standing in line for basketball tickets. Indiana doesn’t deserve to have a team like Purdue as their football “rival” and that, good readers, is why they suck.


I dislike IU for a multitude of reasons but one fan in particular makes me generally hate all things IU sports because he kind of represents the kind of fan many of us at Purdue have experienced: NAME REDACTED.

Listen, I don’t hate the students nor do I hate the university itself. I am thankful that a state institution pumps out high quality doctors to fill our hospitals. I am thankful that Indiana has the Hamilton Luger School of Global and International Affairs which sends more graduates to D.C than just about any other on a consistent basis. My issues don’t lie with the students who cheer for their school with a baseline of respect to it. But there just seems to be something about IU’s athletic department that just makes many of their fans just…awful.

NAME REDACTED represents so many similar interactions with IU fans that I’ve had over the years. Fans who never got close to attending any classes at IU (even with that 80.4% acceptance rate) and want to spout off horrific things like wishing an opposing team’s bus would get hit on the way home (I’ve got the receipts below).

Purdue is a place that, for the most part, fans have an attachment to the university as alumni, employees, living in West Lafayette. IU seems to get most of their fans because they found a shirt at Walmart or a Love’s gas station and because of that don’t feel any sort of connection to the university beyond wins and losses. They don’t care how awful their behavior makes the rest of the university look because, like NAME REDACTED has shown, it’s all about what the AD can do for you personally. It’s probably also why he has been blocked by the very basketball and football programs he claims to root for on Twitter. That’s also why he is the lowest common denominator of fan most of us at Purdue think of when it comes to IU.

Boiler Up! Hammer Down! Hail Purdue!