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It is week two in the Big Ten and that usually means a slate of delicious cupcakes. Of the 14 games on the docket we have three games against FCS squads, three helpings of delicious MACtion, two games against the Fun Belt, and Hawaii coming to Columbus. There are, at least, a handful of decent games as there are three matchups in the informal Big Ten/Pac-12 challenge, so you can’t avoid getting complete diabetes from all the cupcakes. It all begins at noon with, of course, Purdue.
Indiana State (1-0) at Purdue (0-1) Noon, ESPNNews
For one week, at least, Purdue should be heavily favored. The Boilers demonstrated last week they are much bigger and stronger than in recent years. If not for the four interceptions from Austin Appleby it would been enough for a win. That difference should be more pronounced this week. If Purdue has any trouble this week it should be reason for full blown panic. I would like to see us get enough of a lead that David Blough can get some second half action, just to get his feet wet. Purdue 41, Indiana State 17
Oregon State (1-0) at Michigan (0-1) Noon, ABC
The Big Ten/Pac-12 Challenge could almost be considered a Michigan-Oregon challenge this week, as both Michigan schools host both Oregon schools. It is also the second straight Pac-12 game for the Wolverines and the home debut of the Harbaugh. It likely won’t be a pretty game. Both teams were awful through the air last week, but at least Oregon State can run the ball a bit. I am not convinced that Michigan is that good, and the Beavers, even as a double-digit underdog, have a good shot here. Oregon State 21, Michigan 20
Western Illinois (1-0) at Illinois (1-0) Noon, BTN
The Illini are in the same boat as Purdue. They are facing a decent FCS team (WIU is getting votes in the FCS poll), but they need to take care of some business at home. This shouldn’t be close, given what Illinois did to Kent State. Illinois 56, Western Illinois 10
Bowling Green (0-1) at Maryland (1-0) Noon, BTN
Now here is a dangerous game for the B1G. As you know, Bowling Green comes to Purdue in two weeks for what is probably a must-win game for Darrell Hazell, especially if the Boilers lose to Virginia Tech. They have an up-tempo high powered offense that loves to rack up yards and points. That included 424 yards passing against Tennessee, a ranked team, in week 1. Unfortunately, the defense is tissue soft, giving up 59 points and 600 yards of offense. If you want a fun shootout to start your day, this is it. Maryland 56, Bowling Green 42
Buffalo (1-0) at Penn State (0-1), Noon, ESPN2
Does Penn State even have an offensive line? The Nittany Lions gave up 10 sacks last week. That is a huge number. I don’t know if Drew Brees even got sacked 10 times during the entire Rose Bowl Season. It is not like temple had Ryan Kerrigan going against Ohio State, either. One of the sacks came on a two-man rush that was about as ugly as you can get. This is a week for Penn State to get things right or they are in the proverbial deep shit. Penn State 24, Buffalo 14
Miami (OH) (1-0) at Wisconsin (0-1), Noon, ESPNU
Corey Clement is questionable, but it shouldn’t matter. Miami is a far cry from the Miami that used to rule the MAC a few years ago. It is a shell of itself and Wisconsin is going to put up a lot of points in this one. Wisconsin 49, Miami 10
Hawaii (1-0) at Ohio State (1-0) 3:30pm, BTN
Hawaii is going to be wearing some pretty sweet uniforms for this one, but otherwise there is going to be blood. A lot of blood. Ohio State 55, Hawaii 7
Washington State (0-1) at Rutgers (1-0), 3:30pm, ESPNU
Do not watch this game. Seriously. Find something else to do. Washington State’s pass wacky offense going against a Rutgers secondary that is missing four players would normally be fun, but Washington State couldn’t even beat a bad FCS team at home last week. Your time is better served elsewhere. Rutgers 24, Washington State 17
Minnesota (0-1) at Colorado State (1-0), 3:30pm, CBS Sports Network
Here is a very interesting 3:30pm game. The Gopher defense did a decent job of slowing down TCU last week, but the offense is looking for a receiving threat outside of KJ Maye. Colorado State hung 65 on a hapless FCS team last week and has the offense to do some damage here. I think this could be an upset this week because I am not buying the Minnesota hype at all. Colorado State 27, Minnesota 24
Eastern Illinois (0-1) at Northwestern (1-0), 4pm, ESPNNews
Eastern Illinois threw up the elusive fünfer last week in a 33-5 loss to Western Illinois. That’s about the only thing interesting here. Northwestern 38, Eastern Illinois 9
Iowa (1-0) at Iowa State (1-0), 4:45pm, FOX
Black Heart Gold Pants Preview
Time for EL ASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICCCCCCCCCCCCCOOOOOOOOOOOO!
This game is best explained in the article listed above:
Because ¡El Assico! brings out the worst in both teams. They fumble. They punt. They punt some more. They play down to each other, or under each other, and sometimes rent heavy equipment and begin tunneling under the very surface of the earth to submarine even your lowest expectations. They do not score.
¡El Assico! hears your order for a steak, and returns to the table holding a charred hamburger patty. You ordered this steak medium-rare, btw. ¡El Assico! is so bad at this and refuses to buy a meat thermometer or apologize.
This game deserves a weird score. Iowa State 19, Iowa 11
Oregon (1-0) at Michigan State (1-0) 8pm, ABC
This is your best game of the week and the winner has an early trump card for one of the playoff spots. For Michigan State that might mean it can survive a loss to Ohio State as long as it wins all of its other games. The Spartans are the best team in America that hasn’t played for the title in each of the last two seasons. They also get an Oregon team whose defense struggled against eastern Washington last week. Michigan State 38, Oregon 35
South Alabama (1-0) at Nebraska (0-1) 8pm, BTN
Nebraska got its stomach punch loss out of the last week when Mormon God smited them. Now they get a nice Fun belt Cupcake at home. It should be an easy win for Nebraska. Nebraska 45, South Alabama 10
Florida International (1-0) at Indiana (1-0) 8pm, BTN
Ron Turner returns to the Big Ten! FIU had one of the bigger upsets last weekend when it beat central Florida 15-14 as UCF wrote a textbook on how to screw up a game winning field goal attempt that included a true freshman kicker in his first collegiate attempt, multiple penalties that pushed the attempt from 30 to 47 yards, and letting the clock wind down with running plays instead of going for the throat. They have a decent defense and, as nearly 700 yards gained by Southern Illinois can attest, Indiana once again lacks anything resembling a defense. Florida International 31, Indiana 28
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