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Purdue Football Season Tickets Arrive With Perks For All

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Yes, Purdue is so desperate to fill the stands that each season ticket comes with a Buy One, Get One Free coupon to ANY home game.

I got a wonderful surprise in my mailbox today, as my 2014 Purdue Football season tickets officially arrived. Yes, I am excited even though Purdue went 1-11. It really can't be worse than last year, can it?

Unfortunately, my excitement isn't shared by many people. I have had season tickets every year since 1987 when my parents first got me a ticket at 8 years old. I have never seen tickets arrive with so many little things that are basically cries for help for a program in trouble. They are nice perks, however. Let's go through them:

Officials season ticket-holder pin:

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via pbs.twimg.com

By wearing this pin you are announcing to the world that you are a masochist. If you renewed this season after last year Purdue now knows you're an easy mark, because it means you'll get football tickets after anything.

COUPONS!

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Yes, you now get coupons with your season tickets, and I don't mean the old "$5 off of a purchase at University Spirit." The first is a free box of popcorn, which is nice. It is a friendly, "We're so sorry for 2013." The second is basically the athletic department begging you to bring people to a game this fall. It is the unprecedented Buy one, Get one free coupon to ANY home game. Got a friend that goes to Northwestern? Give them this and they can bring a friend.

What's also amazing is that I renewed my tickets by the deadline to receive two additional free tickets to the home opener against Western Michigan. Purdue has done this for years, but since I purchased two season tickets I have two of these coupons. Since you can buy tickets for the Western Michigan game as low as $5 I can now have as many as six additional tickets to the home opener (beyond my two regular seats) for a total of $10 out of pocket. By comparison, most High School games in Indiana cost $5 with no other discounts.

The South End Zone Pass:

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The money item is right here. This pass (non-transferable!) is what gets you into Morgantown, the new Super Happy Fun Zone for adults with the necessary alcohol needed to watch Purdue football at times. If you lose it, it costs you $50 for a replacement and the pass only gets one person in, so if you have two people you had better have two passes.

Game Day Themes!

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I guess they can't make the Western Michigan theme "Dear God, please just win a damn game Day"