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Almost every blog in the Big Ten Network here at SB Nation had its own version of what questions should have been asked at Big Ten Media Days. I had my own, as I tried to do one for each coach, while there are some others I had to share too:
"Pat, WHO IS THE NORTHWESTERN BAGMAN? IS IT YOU, PAT? ARE YOU THE BAGMAN?"
— The Champaign Room (@Champaign_Room) July 24, 2013
Coach Hazell is up next. Hoping @PaulMBanks asks him where his mustache is.
— Travis Miller (@HammerAndRails) July 24, 2013
"Coach Hazell, exactly what the fuck is a Purdue?"
— The Champaign Room (@Champaign_Room) July 24, 2013
Somewhere Gary Nord is saying, "YOU'RE INSANE PLAYING JUST ONE QB, HAZELL!" #nordfense
— Travis Miller (@HammerAndRails) July 24, 2013
"Coach Andersen, are you the former NFL kicker?"
— Travis Miller (@HammerAndRails) July 24, 2013
@B5Q "I really enjoy it when he cradles me in the spoon position and tells me it will all be okay."
— Travis Miller (@HammerAndRails) July 24, 2013
@Adam_Jacobi "Coach Beckman, will your team's theme music this year be the Undertakers' 'Dead Man Walking?'"
— Travis Miller (@HammerAndRails) July 24, 2013
Coach Beckman 'Will do whatever is necessary to get better every day.' = Okay, please coach this season in a coonskin cap.
— Travis Miller (@HammerAndRails) July 24, 2013
"Coach Wilson, how hard is it to stand there and talk about Indiana football with out breaking down sobbing about your plight?"
— Travis Miller (@HammerAndRails) July 24, 2013
RT @ourhonordefend: "Coach Wilson, did Tom Crean get you a 'back-to-back Sweet 16' ring?"
— The Only Colors (@TheOnlyColors) July 24, 2013
I will be very disappointed if Urban Meyer doesn't take the podium in Walter White's porkpie hat and announce he is in the empire business.
— Travis Miller (@HammerAndRails) July 24, 2013
While Dantonio's speaking? Rude. RT @Telegraph: We understand that the #royalbaby's name will be announced within the next 15 minutes.
— Chris Vannini (@ChrisVannini) July 24, 2013
"Opening with Illinois for 5 straight years, what's that like Coach Pelini?" [Pelini pulls out party hat, kazoo, throws confetti, dances]
— edsbs (@edsbs) July 24, 2013
"Coach Dantonio, does the new staff at @MaizenBrew still think you're a vampire?"
— Travis Miller (@HammerAndRails) July 24, 2013
RT @Champaign_Room: While Urban is speaking hundreds of his former players are roaming the country committing violent crimes.
— CornNation (@CornNation) July 24, 2013
"Coach Kill, why do you look like an actual Gopher?"
— Travis Miller (@HammerAndRails) July 24, 2013
"Coach O'Brien: We have Mark Emmert right here. Would you like to punch him in the nuts?"
— Travis Miller (@HammerAndRails) July 24, 2013
"Coach Ferentz: When did vanilla become too wild of a flavor for you and your offense?"
— Travis Miller (@HammerAndRails) July 24, 2013
Reporters graciously didn't let presser enter the final 2 minutes, where Ferentz would stutter, false start an answer, and eventually punt.
— Patrick Vint (@HS_BHGP) July 24, 2013